it's raining.

i was just about to stop writing down my thoughts here. and maybe create some new virtual space on some different platform because i think i will be getting a little more personal in the following few months. a little more private, a little less public. i might still do it though.

anyway.

yesterday was supposed to be a macchiato day yet somehow i ended up in a parking lot, surely, every slot in my mind was parked with a deep thought. call me weird but it's nice. i mean to just sit down in a car, with the seat pulled back and all plus it was raining. yes. there was even a dramatic swooshing and booming background noise while i intensified the ponders of the mind, things that i would have rendered as insignificant, had i taken the cup of macchiato, this would not have happened.

and it is all because of one word. surely you can't expect me to reveal that to you.

i run.

footsteps,
trailing behind,
never faltering, ever closing,
the past chasing the present into the future,
and so i run,
yet when i turn,
all i see are...

shadows,
dancing behind,
never leading, ever following,
the past haunting the present into the future,
and so i run,
yet when i shut my eyes,
i still hear...

laughter,
echoing behind,
never lessening, ever mocking,
the past taunting the present into the future,
and so i run,
even with my eyes close,
even till the sun blows.

The Player,

Once there lived a busy boy,
Who was always, so charmingly coy,
But when he got his new found toy,
Was he filled with such a joy.

Now the toy was just a playful ploy,
A little fun, though not one to cloy,
However, like this envoy,
There is always a little decoy.

two point four 101.

i am as fit as a dildo, which provides a crude innuendo cum explanans to the aforementioned explanandum.

anyway, i am very very very extremely undeniably bored. Though, varied imaginations from the Wheel of Time series, written by the late and revered Robert Jordan, fill my mind. From the Aes Sedai, omnipotent women who can channel the One Power, the female's side at least, known as saidar, to their male counterparts, who are encumbered with the Dark One's taint that spreads across saidin, the male version of the One Power to Warders, sworn and bonded to the female Aes Sedai, to protect them from physical harm to the Black Ajah and the Forsakens and to the Dark One himself. But that is all. Nothing else. After that i hit a blank wall. Void.


Vielleicht sollte ich versuchen, Französisch zu lernen.

Nichts Besonderes, oder?

i realized i rushed through what i wrote down previously and therein lies not much of a flow in my story but hey it was 5:45 in the morning yes i did wake up from a princess-like 13 hours of sleep but that doesn't automatically mean i can function like a monotonous but intelligent robot that leads a sedentary life well at least if i had a robot it would lead a boring life even the owner is like that who knows it might even malfunction due to the banalities it has to go through day in day out.

imagine a large cavern where in the olden days tribes from a certain area would bring their sacrifice on a monthly basis be it a male brown cow, a pig without a tail or a white rabbit, where if that deed is not done the gods would go in hunger and strike in anger at those tribes, a cavern so huge that one wonders how such a sacrifice would even suffice. i don't know how to continue that but somehow my stomach feels like that now and imma call down the wrath of gods on the refrigerator.

let me grace you with...

how.

to.

abstain.

hohoho.*tightening*

"Float like a Bee, Sting like a Butterfly."

They did not see their impending doom.

The vast array of vibrant colors that lay on the back of her wings seemed to amalgamate into a blinding dizzying ball of light that changes in direction every time the wind picked up. The graceful green of the leaves partitioned with thickened red lines, right next to the deepest blue of the ocean dotted with refreshing spots of orange, all kept in bound with a black curvaceous boundary, yet nothing really beats the majestic white that spanned the lower half of the wings right down to the tails, that ended with a tinge of black. Despite the magnificent beauty, there was an edge of nervousness or rather a hint of trepidation to it as the powerful wings undulated up and down in a vicariously slow manner.

And there was a good reason to it.

Right behind was a voracious buzzing that appeared to deceptively come from the constant lightning-speed flapping of translucent wings, wings that were attached to a rounded hull that was thickly striped with yellow and black. Yellow and black that went all the way around and around but now the dual colored strips coalesced into a dark, fluid motion that zinged left and right, always a step behind the orb of light.

Neither saw their impending doom.

For not very far ahead, was a structure, so pellucid that only the faintest drops of the morning dew that clung dangerously to it betrayed its presence. And right at the center, crouched a figure so huge, so silently that it seemed like a farcical contradiction. On each side of its body stretched four stringy, hairy legs and at each end was a claw that allowed it its deadly grip on nearly every surface imaginable. Just a moment before, it had been busy feeding off a near-unrecognizable carcass that lay nearby, displaying a paucity of life and exuding only the aftermath of death. But now all eight round eyes that were located near the top of its head are casually yet ravenously focused on the oncoming sphere of light and following tightly behind another buzzing shadow that somehow seemed to blend into the background. But nothing escapes its eyes. Nothing.

what happens next?

anyway i wanna share with you a picture.
|

it had been raining very heavily. it was out in the open, there was lightning all over and its leg was broken.

do you feel guilt flowing through you? if so, a fortiori, me too, with a multiplied magnitude. i happened to pass by there and i had done nothing. at first, i had thought that the phrase, let nature do its job, would suffice in justifying my conscience. yet there hasn't been a second that passed where i have not regretted for what i had not done.

please do me a favor and pray for this unfortunate soul. this brave tiny unfortunate soul that braced the dangerous world alone, in life and perhaps, though hopefully not, in death.

i am saddened.

yes,

i know i know if this goes on this is going to turn into a self-made fan site but can you really blame me.